A personal wedding vow is one of the most emotional moments during a wedding ceremony. It's an opportunity to tell your friends and family why you love each other, why you chose each other and what promises you make to each other for the future. But writing these promises can be a challenge. To help you with this, I've put together some tips to help you find your own personal words.
1. Take your time
A personalised wedding vow is not something you write ‘just like that’. Unless you're the type who always needs the ultimate pressure to get creative, it's best to start writing a few weeks before the wedding. This will give you enough time to organise your thoughts, get inspired and perhaps go through a few versions before you are satisfied.
2. Remember the beginnings
A good way to start the writing process is to think back to the beginning of your relationship. How did you meet? How did you feel? Is there a special moment when you knew you belonged together? Such memories are not only emotional, they also help to bring your relationship to life in your words.
3. Be authentic
The most important thing about a personalised wedding vow is that it suits you. You don't have to write poetic masterpieces - it's about expressing your feelings as you feel them. Whether humorous, profound, short or detailed - as long as it reflects your true emotions, it will be perfect.
4. Talk about the present and the future
Your wedding vows should include your past experiences together as well as your hopes and promises for the future. Talk about what you value about each other, what connects you and what you want for each other. But it is equally important to emphasise what you promise each other - in good times and bad.
5. Get specific
General phrases like ‘I will always be there for you’ are nice, but often a little impersonal. Try to include concrete examples or anecdotes in your promises. Think about shared experiences or challenges that you have overcome. This makes your promise unique and gives it a very personal touch.
6. Give your partner an insight into your thoughts
Take the opportunity to tell your partner what you perhaps don't say so often in everyday life. What qualities do you particularly love? What moments have shown you that you want to spend the rest of your lives together? It's often these small gestures or thoughts that make the difference.
7. Don't put yourself under pressure
You don't have to try to write the ‘perfect’ wedding vows. Your words will be emotional and special either way because they come from the heart. So don't put too much pressure on yourself to do everything perfectly. It's okay if your voice trembles with excitement or if you have to pause for a moment - that's part of this emotional moment.
8. Practise performing
Even if it may feel strange: practise reciting your vows. This will help you get used to saying the words out loud and make you less nervous on the big day. It can also help to practise your vows in front of a mirror or a trusted person.
9. Length: Less is often more
There is no perfect length for a wedding vow. Some couples only need a few sentences to express their love, others write a whole page. The important thing is that you feel comfortable with each other. However, make sure it doesn't get too long - sometimes short, concise words are the most powerful.
10. Include humour
If it suits you, don't hesitate to include some humour in your vows. This lightens the atmosphere and shows that you as a couple don't lose your sense of humour even in serious moments. But make sure you strike the right tone - it should still be respectful and affectionate.
Conclusion: Trust your own words
Your personalised wedding vows are one of the most intimate and beautiful gifts you can give each other. Take the time to really think about your feelings and trust that your words - no matter how simple or elaborate they may be - will be perfect. Because they come from the heart, and that's all that matters.
I hope these tips will help you to write your very personal and emotional wedding vows. If you need support or have any questions, I will be happy to assist you as your wedding officiant! Just get in touch with me 🙂
